Sunday, October 12, 2014

The Boring Racist

Seriously, y'all!  I am getting tired of these dates!!!!!  I really wish I could say that the title for this post is wrong, but sums up this guy perfectly.

At first, I didn't want to believe he was actually racist as that is a big no-no in Singapore, but it turns out that he is.  How do I know?  Oh, because being as nice as I am, I gave him another chance.  HUGE MISTAKE!  Ladies, if they seem like they are kind of an asshole on the first date, or...racist, they probably are and you shouldn't waste your time or phone plan minutes talking to them any further.

Before you scroll down anymore, please watch the video, then scroll down for an update on things that have transpired since our date.

The Boring Racist

Okay, so the update (all taking place within a week of us meeting).  We had continued to message back and forth, mainly him messaging me.  His messages were very flirty and he kept asking to see me again.  I was busy with work and well, life, so we didn't meet up during the week.  Plus, he never came up with an actual plan.  He would say we should see each other and then offer nothing for us to do.  He would also make comments about how far away I am even though he was the one begging to see me!!!!  UGHHHHH!!!!!!

He asked if we could see each other on my day off.  I figured I would give him another chance because maybe he was just nervous the first time.  We decided to go see a movie after arguing over which movie because he wanted horror and I refuse to see horror movies.  I, of course, have to find the movie times and locations because we all know someone who has lived in Singapore for 38 years would have no clue how to find this information.

Well, in the middle of the night I got some drunk message about how white people are too much work.  Not even kidding!  Needless to say, I didn't reply.  He sent another message the next morning saying he wasn't going to see a movie with me.  I proceeded to tell him the reasons women didn't like him and none of them included his looks....and then blocked him.  Is it too late to become a nun?

Tuesday, October 7, 2014

Is Being "Hot" a Get Out of Jail Free Card????

When I started this project, I knew the results wouldn't be shocking.  I went into it with the notion that my vapid, whiney girl would get a lot of attention.  What I wasn't prepared for was how much attention she received no matter how rude, nasty, insulting, and inconsiderate she behaved.  Men seem to be willing to deal with a lot as long as the chick is hot enough.  I know for a fact, I could NEVER get away with this behavior.  Men wouldn't give me a second glance.  You can't be a big girl AND a bitch!

Honestly, it made me ill to say the things I said to these men.  I hated being so vain and materialistic.  When I go on dates I have a hard time with men spending what I think is too much money.  This girl I created had no issue with it and in fact, insisted that men take care of her.  She had no identity of her own, she offered nothing to the world.  She broke my heart because when I created her, I based her attitude on women that I know, women that I have seen, and women that are idolized by millions.  That is truly the saddest part of all of this.

Check out my vlog about what went down with this woman and please subscribe to my YouTube channel to stay updated on my latest dating rants.  Take care dating world!!!

The Big Project Part 1

Monday, September 22, 2014

Mendacity Abounds!

Hello everyone!  Please check out my latest vlog (see link below).  It's not a funny topic this time y'all.  Be ready for me to discuss something that has really been bothering over the last few years.  Watch, discuss, leave comments, and let's talk about it!!!!

Mendacity Abounds!

Sunday, September 14, 2014

Texting & Dating...It's Not Rocket Science!

Here it is!  My first attempt at a vlog.  I hope you all enjoy the video and please, let's discuss these topics.  Leave your thoughts, complaints, stories, and/or comments below :)

Saturday, May 24, 2014

Has There Been a Shift in the Force?????

Well, it has been a hot minute since I last blogged.  Sorry for the lapse, but things have been crazy busy and postal codes have been changing.  Let me give everyone a quick (I hope) update.

After a little over three years, I finally left South Korea.  I went off to Prague, Czech Republic in March to get a teaching certification.  Once that hellish month (so much work) was finished, I spent April just hanging out and enjoying the city.  I recently returned home to Florida and I'm not really sure what the next step will be, but for now I'm am just taking it all in.

Needless to say, my dating life was put on hold for quite some time leading up to leaving Korea.  While in Prague there wasn't any time to even think about dating and I wasn't sure if I was going to stay long term.  However, now that I am back in the States, my curiosity got the better of me and I decided to see if the online dating interaction would be different here.  I'll keep you posted on that topic as it develops, but for now I want to address something else.

When I returned home, I noticed a shift in the force.  It seems the dating wall has been knocked down.  You know the wall I'm talking about.  The one that keeps the ripped, fit, hotties from even looking at the "not so gym orientated" people.  I saw guys who looked like they spent eight hours a day lifting weights and crunching their abs holding hands with females who, well...didn't.  Okay fine, I am just going to say it.  I saw those guys with women who are not even close to a size two.  The same went for the fit females.  They were with the nerds or guys who carried a bit of extra weight.  I know, I know..."How can you be so shallow to think these people wouldn't date each other???"  Come on!  I'm not being shallow.  I'm being honest.

We all know how this goes (or how it went?).  Mr. Channing Tatum Look-A-Like always has a Jessica Alba Look-A-Like on his arm.  I'm not saying there is anything wrong with this.  People are typically attracted to someone who shares their interests, i.e. the gym.  It has always made sense to me in the past.  Today though, things seem to have changed.  What I saw was, and I'm not making this up, Mr. Channing Tatum Look-A-Like with Ms. Melissa McCarthy Look-A-Like.  At first, I was like "you go girl!" when I saw couple number one, but then I was just flabbergasted.  I saw multiple couples like this in varying degrees of differences in body type.

For those of you who don't know me, I am no where near a size two.  I have always been a bigger lady and I am 100% comfortable with my weight.  Curves, chubbiness, and love handles make me happy.  I think plus-sized women are gorgeous and as I've gotten older, I must say I find guys with a little extra weight to be very sexy.  I am by no means saying that the chubbier person can't date the ripped person, but you must admit it's not a social norm.  I also understand the concept that people are attracted to someone's personality and not only their physical appearance.  Take me for instance, drop dead sexy personality right here!  What I don't understand is how this was not just a few random couples, but a vast majority of the ones I saw that day.  The new trend seems to be that none of this matters anymore.  Weight, exercise fanatic, nerd, hottie, whatever the stereotype, just doesn't seem to matter.  Am I correct?  Has something changed while I was in the land of everyone over a size zero is fat aka Korea? Please, tell me your thoughts on my observation because I am seriously flabbergasted, impressed, and dying to know what happened!

Sunday, February 9, 2014

From the Fellas: Turn-offs When Dating (Part 3)

I must begin this post with an apology.  I am sorry it has taken me so long to write the final installment for this topic.  Life has taken a hectic turn as I prepare to leave South Korea in a few short weeks.  However, I wanted to make sure I posted part three before I leave, so here it is...

Just to refresh everyone's memory...I interviewed my guy friends, asking them what are their top three turn-offs when they have been on 3-5 dates with a female.  Number three was a bit difficult to narrow down.  I found that most, if not all, of the fellas agreed with numbers one and two, but they scattered on their final turn-off.

The majority seemed to take issue with females sharing too much information.  Some guys were turned-off when a date revealed too much about herself and others didn't like when their date would share too much personal information about the guy with her friends/social media.  I quickly realized how guilty I was of doing both of those things.  I also realized that almost every female friend I have is just as guilty as me.

I am the first person to admit I reveal way too much about myself way too quickly.  I have the "my life is an open book" policy.  On first dates, I tend suffer from verbal vomit.  I'm a talker and I do so love the sound of my own voice.  This makes for a terrible first date.  Now, don't get me wrong.  I sit and listen to his stories.  I ask him questions about his life.  It isn't completely about me, but once the topic turns toward me...look out!  It took until very recently for me to realize how bad this is and how much I volunteer information.  I noticed that a guy I have been seeing for a couple of months stopped asking me how my day went or if I had any plans for the weekend.  It bugged me!  I finally asked him why he stopped.  His answer..."because you will tell me before I even get the chance to ask."  Ouch.  He was right.  I always spout off details of my day/week, what I plan to do after work, who I talked to on Skype.  You name it, I told it.  I am the least mysterious person I know.  Since this eye-opening conversation, I have been working on not informing him of my every moment.  It takes some effort because, as I mentioned, I am a talker.  Of course, being a talker also causes me to reveal information to the gals...

Whenever we have a first date, the female friends circle.  They come around to help choose an outfit or do your hair and they reappear as soon as the date ends because, well, they want the details.  I don't think men mind when we share the normal stuff like where we went, what he wore, how he smelled, what we ordered, did he open doors...that kind of stuff.  Where the issue comes in is when we reveal their personal information to our gal pals.  We are all guilty of telling our besties about his previous relationship or relaying a personal story he shared with us.  After thinking about this, I can't say I blame them for being turned-off.  The world doesn't need to be involved in every single detail of this guy's life!

When we are in the getting to know each other phase of dating, we need to leave some things to the imagination.  This is the stage where we learn about each other, so if one of the parties involved tells their entire life story over the fried onion appetizer at a steakhouse (not a great food choice for a first date, by the way) then there is nothing left to learn.  Also, we need to stop repeating his personal information to the friends.  Let things stay between the two of you.  If he says something that makes you wonder if you should continue seeing him, then discuss it with a close friend, but don't plaster it on Facebook.  In short, sometimes we just need to keep our mouths closed!